THE DAILY CHORTLE

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2 Responses to THE DAILY CHORTLE

  1. bogsidebunny says:

    I plead guilty. Usually it was the door of a girl who us “guys” thought was hot or put out. But at the age of 10 or 11 whispered rumors were just that. Once,as we ran after a surreptitious knock event a daddy gave chase. But we split up and got away.

  2. dekare says:

    These assholes do it all the time here. I live in a rural community where we all have acreage properly. You cannot get on my porch without going thru my gate or jumping the fence. However, at the entrance to my property, right next to the gate, I installed a button for a door bell in myhome. Yes…I went thru the huge trouble and trenched a wire for a bell all the way to my house so that I would know when someone was at my gate. I big huge brass button right NEXT to the address sign, so you cannot miss it. Despite this, packages would either be thrown over the fence where they would get wet, get stolen, or sit all day. And if a package needed to be signed for, they would simply stick the label sticker on the gate telling me I had to pick the package up at their office or go thru this stupid online sign in crap…all because they didn’t want to push a button.

    I put a nice sign up stating to please press the bell at the gate… nothing. I called and complained…nothing. I contacted them thru email and asked them to help me…nothing. I would see the driver on occasion as he was leaving, and beg him to please push the bell when leaving a package, even if he didn’t want to wait for me, but just to let me know a package was dropped off…nothing.

    I put up a sign saying “Hey, asshole UPS driver…use the damn button you moron”. Guess what, he rang the bell that day. Of course, he wanted to pick a fight, and wrongfully tell me that what I did was “assault” and he could call the police on me (his words). I laughed at him and explained to him that he had no clue what assault was, and if he thinks he has been harmed, call the cops.

    Anyway, I figured pissing him off didn’t matter since he wasn’t listening to my wishes anyway. I have NO clue why he refuses to ring the bell, unless it is he doesn’t want to wait the extra minute or two it takes me to get to the gate.

    idiot delivery guy claimed he did ring the bell and does it all the time, as that is what they are instructed. I then pointed to the hidden camera up in a tree looking down at my gate and politely called him a damn liar. He then claimed well that maybe he does forget once in a while, but swore he rang it before. (asshole). Anyway, I made sure to show him the camera to let him know that even though he and I are no longer friends, he better not screw with my shit or mess my my packages, as I am watching him, and will gladly forward it to his supervisor is he deviates from what he is supposed to do.

    Anyway, he still doesn’t ring my bell, but at least I get my packages delivered nicely behind my gate…which is often because I do love me some Amazon, and I am a Prime member. And every time he drops off a package, he looks up and gives me a dirty look right in the camera. He knows I am watching, so he behaves.

    I have to wonder…why didn’t he just ring the damn bell when I asked nicely way before this became a thing.

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